Wellness & Lifestyle

How People Who Feel Calm Most Days Actually Think Differently

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Bernadette Jones, Mental Wellness & Lifestyle Editor

How People Who Feel Calm Most Days Actually Think Differently

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to glide through life like a gentle breeze, unperturbed by the chaos that ruffles the feathers of the rest of us? They appear to maintain a state of calm that many of us struggle to muster even on our best days. This seemingly serene existence isn't just a result of luck or temperament; rather, it's often a byproduct of a distinctive way of thinking and approaching life's challenges.

In this exploration, we'll dive into the mindsets and habits of those who exude calmness, backed by science and expert insights. You'll discover practical strategies you can adopt to bring more tranquility into your own life, without losing that lively edge that makes you, well, you.

Understanding the Calm Mindset

Before we can embody calmness, we need to understand the psychological underpinnings that set the calm crowd apart. It isn't about numbing emotions or avoiding life's turbulence; instead, it involves cultivating resilience and a balanced perspective.

The Power of Perspective

Individuals who maintain their composure in stressful situations often possess the ability to reframe their experiences. This isn't just pop psychology; research in cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) highlights how reframing certain thoughts can lead to significant improvements in mental health (source).

When faced with adversity, calm individuals might ask:

  • What can I learn from this?
  • How does this challenge fit into the bigger picture of my life? Such questions pivot the focus away from immediate discomfort towards long-term growth and understanding.

Emotional Intelligence: The Calm Catalyst

Emotional intelligence (EI) plays a crucial role here. Individuals who score high on EI tend to navigate stressful situations more smoothly, due to their enhanced ability to understand and regulate their emotions (source). This doesn't mean they suppress their feelings; rather, they allow themselves to experience emotions without being overwhelmed by them.

Habits and Practices that Foster Calmness

Identifying the mental frameworks of calm people is just the beginning. Let's delve into the actionable habits they practice daily, which may seem simple yet carry profound effects on their well-being.

Mindfulness: The Art of Being Present

Calm individuals often engage in mindfulness practices that keep them grounded. Mindfulness, in essence, is the process of bringing one's attention to experiences occurring in the present moment without judgment (source). Here's how to incorporate mindfulness into your daily life:

  • Start Small: Begin with short sessions of mindful breathing or a light meditation. Even five minutes of focused attention can shift your entire day.
  • Engage Fully: Whether you’re eating, walking, or working, try to immerse yourself fully in the activity, rather than letting your mind wander to future worries or past regrets.

Intentional Living: Simplifying Choices

The calm often choose to simplify their lives. By minimizing the clutter both physically and mentally, they create a space where calmness can thrive. Consider these strategies:

  • Prioritize Tasks: Identify your top three daily priorities and focus on them with intention, avoiding the urge to multitask or overcommit.
  • Declutter: Reduce mental and physical clutter by organizing your environment. A tidy space can promote a serene mindset.

The Role of Gratitude and Positivity

People who are calm often practice gratitude, which doesn’t mean ignoring negative experiences but acknowledging the positive aspects alongside them. Studies suggest that gratitude can lead to better sleep, lower stress, and improved interpersonal relationships (source).

How to Practice Gratitude

  • Gratitude Journaling: Keep a journal where you note down three things you’re grateful for each day. It helps cement a positive outlook.
  • Express Thanks: Regularly share appreciation with those around you, boosting both your mood and theirs.

Managing Stress Like a Calm Individual

Maintaining calmness, especially during life's curveballs, demands more than just mindset—it requires practical stress management techniques.

The Science of Breath: A Calming Tool

Breathing techniques are pivotal for those who stay calm. Slowing down your breath can activate the parasympathetic nervous system, which helps the body to rest and digest, opposed to the fight or flight response (source).

Simple Breath Work Methods

  • Box Breathing: Inhale for four counts, hold for four, exhale for four, and hold again for four. Repeat this cycle to help regulate your state.
  • Diaphragmatic Breathing: Focus on deep breaths that expand your diaphragm rather than shallow breaths that lift your chest.

Exercise and Nutrition: Underpinning Calmness

Regular physical activity and a balanced diet can't be overstated in their importance to staying calm. Exercise releases endorphins, while a nutritious diet provides the essential nutrients that support cognitive function (source).

Tips for Integrating Exercise and Nutrition

  • Find Joy in Movement: Choose activities you enjoy, whether it’s yoga, running, or dancing, to keep you motivated.
  • Nourish Mindfully: Opt for whole foods, reducing processed options which often lead to energy crashes and mood swings.

Mindset and Self-Talk: Building Inner Resilience

Calm individuals tend to engage in positive self-talk and maintain a growth mindset. This approach turns challenges into opportunities for development rather than threats to their well-being.

Developing a Growth Mindset

  • Embrace Failure: View setbacks as valuable learning experiences. Reflect on what went wrong and how it provides a stepping stone for future success.
  • Moderate Perfectionism: Understand that striving for perfection in every endeavor is a path to unnecessary stress. Aim for progress instead of perfection.

Affirmations and Self-Compassion

Empower your internal dialogue with affirmations that bolster confidence and self-worth. Self-compassion is equally vital; recognize and be kind to yourself when things don't go as planned.

The Community Connection: Social Support

Notably, calm individuals often have strong social networks. Sharing time with supportive friends and family can provide a buffer against stress.

Nurturing Relationships for Stress Relief

  • Quality over Quantity: Focus on building meaningful relationships rather than an extensive network of acquaintances.
  • Open Communication: Practice active listening and open dialogues to strengthen bonds and gain different perspectives.

Embracing a Journey Towards Calmness

Being calm isn’t a destination but a journey—one that involves continuous learning and adaptation. It's the small, consistent changes that eventually lead to a big difference in how you relate to the world around you.

Practical Start Points for a Calmer Life

Begin by incorporating just one or two of the aforementioned practices into your daily routine. Recognize the adjustments in your reactions and mindset as you do so, allowing for gradual but meaningful changes.

Final Thoughts

Ultimately, living a life imbued with calmness doesn't equate to the absence of stress or challenges. It’s about a distinctive way of thinking and living that prioritizes positive perspectives, emotional resilience, and mindful habits.

Wellness Wins

  • Cultivate a growth mindset to turn challenges into learning experiences.
  • Incorporate mindfulness practices to remain present and reduce stress.
  • Engage in regular physical activity and maintain a nourishing diet for mental and physical health.
  • Practice gratitude and positive self-talk to foster a positive outlook.
  • Build strong social connections to enhance emotional well-being.

These takeaways serve as a gentle nudge towards a more serene existence, echoing the insights gleaned from those who’ve mastered the art of living calmly.

Bernadette Jones
Bernadette Jones

Mental Wellness & Lifestyle Editor

Bernadette is a behavior change specialist and mindfulness educator with a background in psychology and wellness curriculum design. She writes about burnout, focus, habit shifts, and emotional resilience—all with warmth and science-backed depth.

Sources
  1. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5244025/
  2. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/1754073916650493
  3. https://www.apa.org/monitor/2012/07-08/ce-corner
  4. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/prefrontal-nudity/201211/science-thanks-the-30-days-gratitude-challenge
  5. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5455070/
  6. https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/exercise-is-an-effective-treatment-for-anxiety
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